Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Accidentally Terrorizing McDonald's Workers!

There was a time in my life that I hated onions, and couldn't even take the tiny little onions they put on McDonald's burgers so I usually ordered my burgers sans onions. Usually. But one time, going through the drive thru [sic] I forgot to mention my distaste for onions. When I took a bite and found them hiding in my burger I was already on my way home and I was in no mood for either scraping them off while driving or sucking it up and eating them.

There was another McDonald's on the way, so I figured I would just go in there and tell a small, tiny lie that I asked for no onions but they put yes onions. I knew it was wrong, a little bit. I mean, I figured they'd be losing like, a dollar or less. Small beans. So I walked into the store with my bitten burger in hand and tried to be polite (because I knew I was a liar):

"Hello, can I help you?" He was the manager.

"Hi. I was just in here and I ordered a burger with no onions, but I guess you must have accidentally put some on there. If it's no trouble, could I please get a new burger without? Thanks :) "

"No problem. Just one moment." I was pretty sure I was going to get my onion free burger without incident.

He turned around and took a few steps to the kitchen and yelled "Hey!" All the cooks (all Hispanic) looked at him and he held up and displayed my lie of a burger while saying something in Espanol. He then violently threw it into the trashcan and started going off on them in Spanish. A lot. And loud. They all looked like beat puppies afterward, and sullenly (but quickly) made my "corrected" meal, and it was all my fault that those poor workers got that verbal flogging. 

I got my food, said thanks without looking him in the eye, and left. I felt pretty bad. So unless you REALLY don't like onions, I don't recommend trying this. 

The End.


  1. Those poor employees, I'm a former Mickey D employee but I was never a cook but if my boss had acted like that to me I would have walked the ef out. But good story/learning experience.

  2. And you ate that burger didn't you? I tried that at the local Hereford House which is pretty swanky. I ate all but one bite of my steak and then called the waiter over and told him my steak was cooked wrong, I really wanted it medium instead of medium rare. He went back to the kitchen. I waited quite a while assuming my steak would arrive any minute when the OP swat team rushed in and slammed me to the floor, cuffed me, and beat the livin daylights out of me. In jail I swore never to do that again until I found out they busted me for an overdue parking ticket not the steak deal. Boy did I feel stoopid. The next day I went back to Hereford House and they gave me my steak...flies and all.

  3. I didn't even know Overland Park HAD a SWAT team, but they sound incredibly intense. They are very serious about that $20 ticket! Nice of Hereford House to be so accommodating though. I was in Applebees once (in real life) and a woman ate her entire steak before complaining that it was too salty and wanted a new one. And she got it.

    Nicole, it was pretty scary. I don't know if you could have gotten your legs to work to walk out after.

  4. That's actually a pretty good idea... I hate onions too. One time I ordered a cheeseburger no onions through the drive through. After I drove off I realized that not only did the burger have onions, they also forgot to take the plastic wrapping off of the cheese before putting it on the burger. The plastic really adds depth to the burger. So now I always order my cheeseburgers with plastic wrapping.