Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Long, Random Post!

It has been some time since I posted a blog, and it's not because I hate you guys (I only strongly dislike). It is because I have been involved in numerous other sources of entertainment so after work I had to carefully allocate my time, and most of that time has been given to Veronica Mars. Yes, the same Veronica Mars that has been cancelled for 4 years and was probably mainly marketed to girls. Don't let that cloud your opinion, that show is intense as shit. Plus... Kristen Bell. Just Sayin'.

I've also been deep into Under the Dome by Stephen King, which I discussed here. I spend about 2 hours a night reading that crazy book, and I can read about 50 pages in those 2 hours. The book is 1074 pages long. So if my math is correct, and after some rounding, this book will take me 43 hours to read. And I'll tell ya, I'm gonna enjoy all 43 of those hours, even though I may absolutely hate some of the characters at the moment.

I figure in this post I'll just kind of fill you in on what's been going on while I've been ignoring my blogging duties. This is going to be very random. First off, there is a dead cat on the side of the road that I guess some car has hit. It's been there for about a week, but tonight when I drove home I noticed some of the nice kids have spray painted it blue. I know it was spray paint because they left the paint can sitting next to it, obviously proud of their work. These kids are our future, people. Actually, I take that back; the only person to make it big from Arkansas is Bill Clinton, and well... Yeah.

I DID however find a great grocery store to shop at! I may have mentioned how my favorite place to shop was Price Cutter, which is in the next town over. So if I wanted to get a few things I'd have to take a 20 minute drive to do so. Or I could just shop at Walmart which is right near me, but who wants to shop there? Not this guy. Then I found a wonderful store, Harps, which is much, much closer to me! I actually think they're owned by the same people, but this store is far superior, in a they're-not-superior kind of way! It reminds me of the small-town store my hometown used to have when I was little, Buy-Rite. Just imagine Arkansas. Like, stereotypical Arkansas. Now imagine going to a grocery store in the place you just imagined. This Harp's is that place! I went there tonight to pick up some supplies for a Taco Lasagna I plan on making, and it called for a green pepper. I go to the green peppers. I got to choose from a selection of 5, and those 5 were really more sea-green peppers. It was awesome. I took some pictures, but they might be kinda blurry cuz I took them kind of quickly. I was getting some looks from the bumpkins, me with my fancy cell-yoo-lurr phone.
The milk coolers had no lights, or if they did they were burnt out

The entire produce department, plus half of the floral

A dining area, but I saw no deli

Beautiful Bentonville. Woulda been better without all the trucks

In fact, there were two moving trucks in the parking lot, from two different companies. I can only assume that Harp's saves money on shipping stock by renting their own trucks. I also love Harp's because my cashier looked like he was straight from prison. I am almost surprised I didn't see a teardrop tattoo on his face, and his breath reeked of booze. I was so excited! Clearly, this is my new grocery store.

So, I will make that taco lasagna sometime this week, and I hope it turns out good, but here is my last attempt at cooking:

Don't judge a meatloaf by it's elephant-man-like cover

It looks awful, but actually tasted pretty good! If you can't tell (and I'm sure you can't) it is meatloaf. And although it ended up tasting okay, I wouldn't eat it while looking/thinking about my dog. 

In other news, I've had a lemon since the day I moved to Arkansas, 3 months ago. I never used it, and it just kind of lounged on my counter. It got all dry and shrively.

It's still good, right?

Instead of doing the normal, mature, I-just-moved-away-and-got-my-first-big-boy-job thing by throwing it away, I decided to dissect it, which proved to be much more fruitful (haha puns). The inside wasn't super exciting, but it DID smell just like Lemonheads candy. Win!

Grab me a Corona!

After the experiment, I went to Macadoodle's. It was a pretty common trip until I was leaving and noticed a Truck in the parking lot with an interesting license plate. At first, the graphic around the plate is what grabbed my attention; it's not everyday you see a dog on a plate. Then I read the vanity plate and had to laugh.

Don't sit on that seat

FAP!? Hahahaha, oh man, that's amazing. I don't even know if it is intentional, but between the FAP license plate and the sticker of Calvin having bodily fluids sprayed in his face by the wind... Well, it's just classic. If you don't know why "fap" is funny, you are probably either too old, or too popular and aren't online as much as I am. Explanation

Hmm, what else... I went to a thrift store and saw a lifesize cutout of basketballer, Dr. J.

The picture turned out blurry and his hands and feet are cut off cuz the camera operator is a noob. But the cutout was $20, a steal in most cases, especially considering Mr. Julius Erving played in the 70's and 80's, so this thing had to be old. But his arms were being supported by tape and paint-mixers. He's obviously out of practice if he has to use arm splints just to hold a cardboard basketball. Sheesh. 

So, over the weekend a friend came down and we bought a video game called Amnesia: The Dark Descent. It is a horror/survival game which got pretty good reviews, getting praises such as "scariest game ever," or "I pooped my pants." The usual. Well, I love horror movies and have played every Resident Evil and Silent Hill, along with Dead Space and all those kind of games. I'm pretty used to these kinds of games, and am familiar with most of their scare tactics. Well, Amnesia is different. For one, you don't have any weapons, but there are monsters. And they're fast as shit, too. 

Oh sweet God, get it away!

And the screen goes blurry if you look at the bad guys too long, which makes it even creepier. Your guy is combating insanity in this game, so it makes sense I guess. I have never screamed out loud during a video game until this game, and that was while playing with a friend, but it was okay when he was here. But when he left and I played it by myself. At night. With the lights out? Good Lord. At one point I was at a foggy location with suspenseful music, and so I was wide-eyed and looking at the screen, and I guess I leaned forward because the chair squeaked. Shitballs, man... I about pooped my pants. The review was right. Also, being 25 years old I haven't had a nightmare in years. My brain is smart enough to not worry about house creaks and what not, but not that night. I actually had to get up and watch funny videos online for a while before I could get back to sleep. Yikes.

Ok. You should be about caught up now. I did get some good stuff at the thrift store, but that will have to wait for another day. In the meantime, keep on fappin'.

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